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The Clean Talk CD
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Clean Talk is a set of communication tools that help you make any conversation safer and more productive.
Clean Talk is the model we use in Shadow Work® when we want to speak cleanly and clearly, and especially when we want to avoid or resolve a conflict.
The Clean Talk CD features the lively humor of brother-sister team Shadow Work® founder Cliff Barry and Practically Shameless author Alyce Barry. Cliff and Alyce have packed this CD absolutely full of useful tips that you can listen to at your own pace. The CD is approximately 79 minutes in length and comes in a shatterproof plastic case with two handouts.
WHAT DOES "CLEAN" MEAN?
"Clean" communication means that each person takes responsibility for their part of whatever is happening instead of placing the responsibility on the other person.
The Clean Talk tools help you prevent your shadows from leaking out and hurting other people. As a group leader, the words that come out of your mouth are what you're selling. They're your bottom line. Clean Talk helps you build trust, and that trust will make you more successful at what you do.
WORD COACHING: A NEW SKILL YOU CAN OFFER
In addition to Clean Talk, the Clean Talk CD teaches you how to "Word Coach" someone else. Word Coaching is a skill you can offer as a facilitator to help people speak more cleanly in important situations.
Included with the CD are two handouts: a map of the four channels of communication, and a cheat sheet for Word Coaching in all four channels.
BENEFITS OF CLEAN TALK
Here are just some of the benefits of Clean Talk:
1. CommunicationThe big picture.Clean Talk teaches you what none of us learned in school, that there are four distinct channels of communication: opinions, wants, feelings, and data. When you learn to recognize the four channels, you have a tremendous advantage going into any conversation. For example, you can open up a channel that's missing that might otherwise cause conflict later. Recognizing the four channels helps you reach resolution more quickly and effectively.
2. Creates trust.Clean Talk helps you create trust. Where there's more trust, there's also more collaboration, because all partners can share more responsibility. When you use Clean Talk to take responsibility for the way you speak, other people will, too.
3. Strengthens relationships.Clean Talk helps you prepare for tough conversations and come through them with stronger relationships. As you learn to use all four channels of communication, you'll discover where you need to clean up what you want to say so that it comes through in a way that builds trust and collaboration, where everyone's taking responsibility.
4. Confidence in delivering unwelcome messages.Clean Talk helps you deliver unwelcome messages with confidence that you're speaking cleanly and clearly, for example, when you're giving someone feedback.
5. Avoids triggering defenses.Clean Talk helps you avoid triggering the other person's defensive responses. Clean Talk teaches you what not to say and how to keep the conversation on track.
6. Helps you see your part.Clean Talk helps you see how your own shadows are involved in the situation. It helps you work through your own issues and say things more cleanly. The other person comes away from the conversation knowing that you're a person of integrity who takes responsibility for your part of the situation.
7. Helps clarify what you want.Clean Talk helps you get clear about what you want out of the conversation and make clear, unambiguous requests that are more likely to be granted.
8. Allows more of you to show up.When you speak cleanly in all four channels, you can put more of your passion into what you say. You can speak more forcefully because you know the way you're saying it isn't going to hurt anyone. As a result, you're much more likely to be heard, and it's much more likely that your request will be granted.
9. Helps handle intense situations.Clean Talk gives you clear-cut guidelines for intense situations. When you go in knowing Clean Talk, you'll know how to manage any communication issue that comes up, and manage your own response to it as well.
10. Avoids unnecessary conflict.Clean Talk helps you turn a conversation toward results without getting into an argument.
11. Conflict resolution.Clean Talk helps you resolve an existing conflict. It helps each partner in a dialogue take responsibility for their part of the argument. In many cases, by the time everyone is talking cleanly, the issue has already been resolved, and you're back to a caring conversation.
12. Uncovers double messages.Clean Talk helps you see through "double messages" that people use when they're scared or defensive. It helps you avoid getting caught up in a double message that obscures the real issue at hand.
13. Helps you handle attacks.Clean Talk teaches you to recognize accusations and projections that come at you. As a group leader, you can be attacked with overt and covert messages. You can get slimed in a variety of ways. The Clean Talk map shows you the four different colors of slime and the facilitation moves that will help cleanse the conversation.
14. Helps you handle dirty questions.Questions can be used to conceal judgments. They can be used to draw somebody out into a fight. They can even be used to hook somebody into giving a compliment. Clean Talk teaches you how to respond to the dirtiest questions we know.
15. Builds leadership confidence.Clean Talk gives you tools for dealing with some of your worst fears about communicating in difficult situations. As a systematic set of tools, Clean Talk gives you more confidence that you can handle whatever happens.
During his years as an MKP leader, Cliff developed the model for clearings that is still used within the MKP today. He took the clearings model with him into Shadow Work®, where he named it Quarter Talk. He built it into the basic training for Shadow Work facilitators. He also took it into the corporate world, where he renamed it Clean Talk.
Since Cliff is a person who can never let anything stay the same for long, he has continued to tinker with Clean Talk over the years. What you'll hear on the Clean Talk CD includes Cliff's latest thinking on: the shadows of Clean Talk and Word Coaching; the nature of questions; the quarter that's most likely to bring speedy resolution; the importance of getting informed consent before Word Coaching; and how to structure a conversation that includes multiple clearings.
So the Clean Talk CD is what we might call Clearings 2.0. In the years since its origins in the MKP, Clean Talk has evolved, like a critter that's been living on a separate continent, so that it has become a slightly different species.
Clean Talk has proven itself thousands of times over nearly two decades. We consider it to be the most effective communications model available.
Clean Talk is required learning for all Shadow Work® facilitators. A copy of the Clean Talk CD is included with registration materials for the Shadow Work® Basic Facilitation Training. For more information on upcoming trainings, contact Shadow Work® Seminars at (303) 530-2840 or by email at firstname.lastname@example.org. Training dates and details are on our Calendar of Events.
In addition, we can teach Clean Talk to your group, business, or organization. For more information, contact Shadow Work® Seminars at (303) 530-2840 or by email at email@example.com.
Clean Talk CD Copyright © 2008 by Shadow Work Seminars, Inc. All rights reserved.